Tuesday, July 30, 2013

"Fuzzy Pick-" NO! NO PICTURES!

If I were to say one thing, and one thing only about Earthbound, it's that the adults of Eagleland are wildly irresponsible, each and every one.

Yes that sounds like such a minor, almost childish gripe, but man I can't stop noticing it. It's everywhere. Dangerous meteorite landed, resulting in a heavy police presence? Sure my completely underage son! Just go ahead and run outside in the middle of the night, I'm sure nothing will hurt and/or kidnap you. Oh, you now have to leave home and save the world cause a bug told you to? Good luck!!

Oh, you want to run over to the neighboring town? Sure, but you have to FIGHT COPS first, in the police station no less! I can't even wrap my head around that level of stupid...Seriously, I haven't seen parenting or even adulting done this poorly since the early Pokemon games (ARE YOU A BOY OR A GIRL!?!?!).

That all being said, I am amazed by how quickly I was sucked into this game. Blah blah clever writing blah blah amazing music blah blah, so far it's been everything the fanboy collective claimed. Aesthetics aside, so far it's the game's mechanics that have impressed me more than anything. Rather than waste my time on an enemy far weaker than me, the game completely skips the battle and just awards me the xp. When I buy a new piece of gear superior to what I'm already packing, the clerk straight up offers to take it off my hands (he pays!). Earthbound also has a subtle hint of realism despite it's cartoonish appearance, a fact I find both charming and infuriatingly evil.

So, I breeze past the first town, appropriately (I guess?) called Onette, and after kicking cop-keister I head to Twoson. The open road is a dangerous place, especially for a child...a fact completely lost on everybody, so naturally I get sucker-punched by a walking mushroom. Because, you know, danger. Whatever, I just have a new hat for a while. I'll just head to town and...hey...I told you to go right, why are you going left...now you're going up? NOOOOOOO MY BRAIN BROKE!! My sweet new mushroom hat dug it's roots into my brain and broke it!! Must...get...to...hospital...Go in, no IN, go in the hospital you brain dead idiot! OK I'm in-why did you just walk back out? And of course the doctor doesn't treat brain-shrooms! A few coronaries later I finally figure out it isn't the drugstore (which would make sense) or the doctor (which would make more sense)  who can fix me, but rather the funny looking, shady guy in the hospital with the bad hair. He's magic, or something. Iunno, he got a head-shroom and I got money.

In their continuing theme of outright bizarre behavior, the townspeople inform me that (despite not having the foggiest clue who I am) that I must go fine Paula because...reasons. Through a cave and another bout of fungus brain later, I'm in the happy town of...Happy Happy Town! Of course this level of happy can only have one explanation: Cult. Evil cult, that is. And blue. An evil, blue cult. Evil, blue, but not smart since they went ahead and told me not only who they kidnapped (the girl I'm looking for), but where she is and all that fun stuff. Upon finding Paula she informs me we are destined to saaaaaaaaaaaave the wooooooooooorld, but she can't exactly help from a cell. I am once again left to mull over these people's strange desire to over share just everything with everyone, continuing this thought as I beat the crazy out of the evil blue cult's Grand Bluebah.

Wouldn't you know it, Paula's dad was also missing a few pages from his How to be a Parent handbook, happily sending his freshly kidnapped-then-rescued daughter with a complete (and armed, might I add) stranger.

Lets just hop in this old black van with these washed-up middle-aged men and see where it leads! No such thing as Stranger Danger when you're a hero!

*Plays for two more minutes* What? it didn't lead to our gruesome deaths?...huh, color me surprised....

Monday, July 29, 2013

KABOOM!!!

I have a confession to make. This is a rather sore subject for me, and it's taking a lot of strength to admit to this, both to my readers and to myself.

I...*deep breath*...am a bad gamer.

I love games, but I generally suck at most titles I pick up, always picking the 'easy', 'novice', or 'sobbing little girl' difficulty setting whenever possible. Dark Souls does not have a 'little girl' setting. Dark Souls doesn't have any difficulty settings. Instead the game rams a saddle on you, shoves a bit in your mouth, and rides you like a borrowed mule (that it borrowed from someone it really didn't like).

Dark Souls Protip #79: No matter how funny it is watching
the shadows of other players die,always remain aware of your surroundings.
Being the little scaredy cat that I am, I basically spent most of my day level grinding. Tag the bonfire, kill the Hollow Soldiers in the immediate area, tag the bonfire, kill the Hollow Soldiers in the immediate area,Tag the bonfire, kill the Hollow Soldiers in the immediate area, tag the bonfire, kill the Hollow Soldiers in the immediate area, tag the bonfire, kill the Hollow Soldiers in the immediate area, tag the bonfire, kill the Hollow Soldiers in the immediate area...Hours of this.

But then, as if a gift of salvation in my time of need, a merchant! Exploring around a place I had been avoiding (as it was guarded by two spear-wielding Hollows, and &%#$ those guys in the ear with a hammer) I notice a staircase, with *sound of singing angels* a merchant at the bottom! With my best gear quickly degrading from all the dying I do so much, his nasty half decayed visage was a vision of beauty. Unfortunately I needed some more souls so I could buy something, so I'll be right back and...

"Hmph. What a waste of time. Go and fall off a cliff."

...The crap you just say to me? HOW DARE YOU SIR!!! How dare you!!! No, Geeky Cat, get a hold of yourself. You need him alive...just...walk...away...

Ahem. So after I manage to level up a few times and grabbing a few (dozen) fire bombs from the...gentleman...I headed for my target: the Taurus Demon.

Getting to the big bastard was hard enough. I wasn't in the mood to fight every single Hollow between the safety of my bonfire and the beast, so every single attempt I made I sprinted past them. Clearly these jerks weren't on my side, as they did everything in their power to slow me down, punching my hit points in the face along the way.

Oh the Taurus Demon. So many times I have had you mere moments from death, just a sliver of your health bar remaining, and yet EVERY SINGLE TIME you manage to smash/slam/sit on me/launch me into freaking space just as I am pulling back my final blow. Oh, but this time, furball, I have yo-no, I'm dead again.

Attempt number eight of the day: Just as I have every single attempt before, I first clear out the two Hollow archers on top of the tower. I jump down, run down the bridge to trigger the demon, sprint back to the tower and climb up before he can knock me down. I jump on top of his head doing a dropping attack...and oh crap oh crap oh crap run awaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! Run run run run run turn around FIREBOMB!!! *gets stomped* ouch! He's almost dead...almost dead, he has the smallest sliver of health left! I've never had him this low, but my own health is but a single flick of his finger away from zero...He pulls back his great ax as I throw one last desperate firebomb...

BOOM BITCH!!!!!

I actually started shaking as I shouted my victory cry at the screen, causing my cat to run into the room meowing. As the Taurus Demon evaporates into new souls for me to use, I skip down the bridge toward the other side's door, the entrance to the Undead Parish!! Finally a new location, I was getting so tired of the Undead Burg. Now I get to explore-Hey it's that dragon from before... *immediately gets barbecued*

...Huh. Whelp that's enough for today! Check in tomorrow kids, for we are Earthbound!

Sunday, July 28, 2013

I've been a bad Cat

Okay! Sorry for the lack of posts, I've been...busy? *mumbles something* ANYWAY!

More than anything my lack of posting has a lot to do with the fact that I reaaaaaaaaaaally don't want to play the game I said I would next: Dark Souls. While I could take the easy route and just not play it, I do feel it is an important experience I should have. The game is brutal in every way, shape and form, but at the same time I will admit it is a good game. But at my heart I am a rage gamer, and more than once during my brief play through I would launch a full verbal assault against the TV, calling into question the game's moral fiber as well as insinuation at it's mother's promiscuity. I can't handle that level of hateful commitment long term (and I run out of insults rather quickly, devolving into shouts of 'poopy-pants' and 'jerk-wad' alarmingly fast), so I'll have to ration my pain-fuel.

Because I am absolutely sure that this game will cause my blood pressure to spike so bad it shoots out of my ears, I have determined I will only play it on Mondays. Hence-forth called Monday Madness, I will play games that for whatever reason make me want to punch just all the babies. The rest of the week will be my recuperation period.

Tomorrow I will jump back into Dark Souls, with the goal of at the very least defeating the Taurus Demon before the day's end. On Tuesday I'll start Earthbound, a RPG from the Super Nintendo era. Consider this a sort of scientific experiment, akin to Jane Goodall's time with the chimpanzees. I have mostly avoided playing due to the overwhelming fanboy explosions I suffered anytime the game is mentioned in the company of many of my friends, with Aaron being the alpha-fanboy in this particular...herd? Flock? Gaggle? Yeah, I like gaggle. Gaggle of fan-boys.

Now to brush up on my Ragenese, for tomorrow, I die!!!

Again and again and again and again...

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Bye bye, Skyrim

You stop that PS3! You stop that right now!!!

Apparently my system doesn't like Solstheim, seeing as the whole thing starts to lag uncontrollably after about half an hour of running around the island. Whatevs, much like a wagon driver headed across the wild frontier, I'll just have to mercilessly beat my team (or game console, as it were) until it gets me to where I'm going. Miraak isn't going to kill himself (although wouldn't it be delightful if he did?).

Like Dawnguard I had already finished a great deal of the main questline in Dragonborn before I decided to go ahead and show Miraak who the real dragonborn was (hint, it wasn't him). I was halfway through the final quest in the series when my gaming ADHD kicked in and I ran off to massacre more goats on the mainland.

Back in Apocrypha I skip through the first few chapters (I'm inside a book, you see) as I have already completed them, until I get to chapter VI. After obtaining a new shout word and dispatching a few minor Seekers Miraak's pet Sahrotaar decided I looked delicious, flying over to test his theory. Instead I shouted him down, hopped on his back and headed for Miraak.

Unlike flying Odahviing to Alduin's keep, I was actually able to experience the ride on Sahrotaar. Hell, I could actually control him. Flying a dragon is alot like driving a busted up old car down a steep hill: It's going more or less where it pleases, there's no power steering, and the only way to stop it is to crash into something. Thankfully that something happened to be Miraak's doorstep, so yay!
"Who's the real Dragonborn now, bitch!?"

Miraak himself has to be my favorite of the main three boss fights. Aside from taking longer to kill, he was also able to actually inflict damage to me. I do wish, however, that his two dragons Relonikiv and Kruziikrel had actually joined in the battle, rather than watching it until Miraak need to steal their souls (killing them instantly and fully replenishing Miraak's health). I also wish it were me to deliver the final blow to him, although watching Hermaeus Mora jab a giant tentacle through his chest then hold him up in the air was pretty hilarious (I really hated that guy. Jerk kept popping up and stealing the souls of dragons I killed).

That's it, then. Just as Harkon and Alduin before him, Miraak too has now fallen to my blade. He manage to put up an exceptional fight, but dead is dead and I have now (kind of) officially beat Skyrim.

While I would LOVE to continue roaming the Nordic countryside, it is *sigh* time to move on. A friend of mine reminded me that I made this blog to catalog my adventures playing games outside my comfort zone, and Skyrim is as comfortable as a brand new feather pillow that also tells me bed time stories. Tomorrow I shall be returning to my figurative (and sometimes literal) bed of spikes: Dark Souls.

Talos guide me.

No worries, dude, take your time....



My first attempt at summoning Odahviing for a fight against another dragon. Seems Alduin's former right-hand Dovah has issues arriving in a timely manner. 

In Odahviing's defense, that mudcrab totally would have prevented me from fast traveling...so, good job?

*p.s. This shrank WAY more than I had planned... I will have to remember this for future comics.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Adventure Time

Due to a nasty case of the glitches, my Vampiric exploits were cut short. I was sent on a side quest to retrieve a few rings, and one of the locations merely points to thin air, no ring in sight. Not a big deal, since despite having to be mostly the same as its Dawnguard counterpart, the vampire half of the story kinda sucks (I had the same issue when siding with the Empire for the Civil War line as opposed to the Nords. They are basically supposed to be the same, but I liked the Nords WAY more).  So what to do with myself now...I finished the Dark Brotherhood and Thieve's Guild story lines, as well as the Companions, and I wasn't in the mood to finish off Miraak. No, I've accomplished WAY too many important, actually relevant things. I need to do something that doesn't matter to anything. How about clearing out all these caves, forts and camps I see undiscovered on my map? Come, Vilkas, we ride for adventure!

Shriekwind Bastion: Yet another Nordic tomb brimming with Draugr  and, surprisingly, vampires. Unlike most tombs, however, this one had a neat little alcove with...boots. Just tons of boots, all neatly sitting there, for no reason I was capable of discerning during my stay.

Darklight Tower: Nothing wakes up an unsuspecting adventurer quite like walking into a room just as someone's being murdered. The murderer, or Illia, claims she like totes has a good reason, so I should go help her kill her mother. Seemed legit, until the point she came up with the brilliant plan to pretend I was a human sacrifice. Turns out despite my self preservation gland screaming the contrary, she actually was legit, and matricide was carried out without a hitch.

Snowshod Farm: I understand the thieve's Guild runs out of Riften, but why do all the farms in the Rift have SO many guards? Afraid I'll steal their cabbages?

Crystaldrift Cave: BEARS! And TROLLS! TROLLS FIGHTING BEARS! Because reasons! Might have something to do with this dead guy and his staff-o-hate...

Whats that, Vilkas? Yes, that is a cave, we just came out of it. No, there aren't any bandits or animals in
there, cause we just killed them all. You were there. Focus, Vilkas.

Ruins of Rkund: Stupid Dwemer crap. Thankfully it was a very tiny ruin.

Ravenscar Hallow: Hagravens. Gross.

Widow's Watch Ruins: A VERY tilted tower with a hag inside. Now just a very tilted tower.

Whats that I see to the West? SHIP!? I LOVE shipwrecks!!! *Crams my circlet of water breathing on my head and bolts Westward*

Orphan's Tear: Despite my hopes this had something to do with Rune's past (a member of the Thieve's Guild), It was just a regular shipwreck with a couple bandits to kill.

Lower Steepfall Burrow: Kinda boring until I remembered the 'lower' part of the name.

Steepfall Burrow: Just as lame as the lower part, but higher. Trolls were there, I guess.

Shrine to Peryite: An outdoor shrine to a lesser known Daedra, with a single Khajiit chilling out nearby. Peryite apparently seeks to cleanse the world through disease which, while a, um, noble cause, it will inevitably fail because that's dumb. Although it's nice to now know who's responsible for those jackasses vomiting on me outside the Dwemer Bthardamz *patooie!*.

Liar's Retreat: This place has kind of a cool premise. A hideout for thieves and bandits, I came across it not long after a Falmer raid. The Bandit chief seemed to have been the only survivor, having locked himself in his room with an angry Falmer spell caster banging on his door. As I finish wiping the Falmer blood from my blade and head toward the exit several unsuspecting bandits walk in, shouting for the (now dead, not my fault) bartender to get them a drink.

Bruca's Reap Redoubt: Here's some guys I haven't seen in a while, Forsworn! Most interesting thing here is that I seemed to have interrupted a Briarheart's ritual, as he was standing at a table with a dead Forsworn body on it, the corpse's heart laying in a bowl next to him.

Harmugstahl: Imma not even try to pronounce that. If I tried I'm pretty sure my tongue would quit in protest.

I find it sort of depressing that because I have played this character for so long I am running out of undiscovered places. Thankfully this proud Nordic nation still has...CAVE! THERE'S A CAVE!!!!! *Dives headfirst into the depths*

"There's a cave ahead-"

Yes, Vilkas I heard you the first time!!!!!

Suck on this, Vampires

I have two words for the ending of The Dawnguard DLC of Skyrim: Armored-Battletrolls (likely three words, but shut up, I want it to be two).

Like the primary story in Skyrim, I did my darnedest to avoid actually completing Dawnguard, which was rough because I really loved Dawnguard's story, therefore I was actually quite close to the end. At the beginning of the DLC (when I first got it) I actually made two separate save files from my usual character: One that sides with the Dawnguard and one that sides with the Volkihar (vampires). Since the split I have done alot outside of the DLC, So I haven't touched my Vampire save file. Maybe I'll do that today, but until then for the purpose of the post I am a member of the Dawnguard itself.

Starting out I already had all the Elder Scrolls I needed, but with my Moth Priest blind I needed a way to
read the damn things. To the Ancestor Glade!!!

You always know that as soon as someone says something, it's going to happen. As soon as I finished reading the scrolls, Serana just HAD to say "Hey, we had better scurry off before the Vampires find us". Lo and behold, not 30 seconds after she said it a gang of vampires and a gargoyle ran up and shanked me in the back. Jerks.

At this point all I needed was Auriel's Bow, the weapon at the forefront of the vampire Harkon's great prophecy...and guess where I had to go to get it! Through Falmer! Know what, Isran? Everlasting night isn't so bad...Even seeing a real life Snow Elf wasn't enough to make up for the annoyance of Falmer (granted I also just didn't like Knight-Paladin Gelebor. I felt that he was a bit bland and that being the only one of his kinda they could have don't more with him, but I digress). So now, here I am, Holy bow in hand, Holy arrows on back. Time to slay me some Vamps.

I return to the Dawnguard to begin gather my forces for the battle ahead. Our numbers were few, but we had the above mentioned freaking armored battletrolls, thus I was confident in victory (also we have me. I'm as cool as like four battletrolls). We meet at Castle Volkihar and begin the attack almost immediately. I loved this fight, actually fighting my way to my prey rather than running up to it (something I loved to do in the Civil War questline). We stormed up the bridge and through the castle doors, demolishing all the denizens within.

Serana and I finally find her father, alone and in his Vampire Lord form, and blah blah blah talking LETS FIGHT! This battle wasn't hard, but I do think it got a little glitchy on me. Harkon teleported around, firing nobody cares what at me, as I stood in the middle and nailed him with the sun arrows. After his health completely emptied, rather than dying he just kind of teleported around, up into the balconies of the room and back down to his blood fountain. He never really did anything but teleport, neither visibly healing or attacking, so I continued to shoot him (I had the Snow Elf bless ALOT of arrows) until he finally dropped dead.

So once again I have saved the day from unmentionable evil. Good girl gloves off, I'm reopening the vampire save (which story wise is mostly identical, but the side missions are more...eviiiiiiiiiiil).

Sunday, July 21, 2013

A Shallow Victory

Disappointment is a common feeling among mankind. Didn't get the promotion you wanted, turned down by the love of your life, discovering Reese's brand peanut butter tastes NOTHING like the stuff in the candy (I am still recovering emotionally). Disappointment can be trivial or life altering, and for gamers, it can be just plain confusing.

After a conversation I had with Aaron last night regarding my general refusal to actually beat games, I decided to finally beat the main story line in Skyrim. As I have mentioned previously, I have pumped clean over 600 hours into this game, all the while avoiding the main storyline like I owed it money. So, I woke up at the crack of noon this morning (it was a little before noon....shut up), put on a pot of coffee and fired up the PS3. I had managed to make a little progress in the game, so rather than start at the beginning of the main story line I was actually a little over halfway through, on the quest 'Elder Knowledge'.

Let it be known I cannot stand Dwemer ruins. Were it possible to commit full genocide in the game, I would have demolished the Falmer...with fire.

Having already completed the Civil War story line, I was able to skip the quests 'Season Unending' and 'Paarthanax*' (*I'll get back to that one shortly....), so after bitch-slapping Alduin at the Throat of the World (punk dragon ran away...) I could skip the political bickering and get straight to the awesome part: killing me some World-Eater (that's Alduin).

Carried by Alduin's right-hand dragon and my newest pet Odahviing I stormed Alduin's keep, dragons flying overhead, wrecking Draugr Overlord and Deathlord face along the way. Upon reaching to top of Alduin's temple Skuldafn I saw Nahkriin, one of the eight Dragon Priests whose masks I am collecting. It was at this point that I began to feel something...amiss. Nahkriin hadn't so much as turned around before I finished him, a surprising feat considering the other four or five Dragon Priests I had already killed were much more challenging. No time to dwell, onward to Sovngarde!

Wow I love the music in Sovngarde. It's the theme from the opening of the game, but slow and haunting. The Nordic afterlife was completely blanketed by Alduin's mist, a substance he used to hunt the souls of Nordic heroes. The atmosphere in this part of the game was amazing. Heavy and terrible.

So why is it that I'm disappointed? Everything so far has been amazing, so what went wrong? Short version: everything after entering Shor's Hall. Alduin himself was little more than a joke in battle, dealing virtually no damage TO me and taking enough damage FROM me to kill him in two landings (I didn't bother shooting him as he flew, instead using Dragonrend when I noticed he wasn't glowing anymore).  Just like that, the great evil of Skyrim, the World Eater Alduin was dead. I had had more trouble killing regular (leveled) dragons in the field. Tsun, guardian of SHor's Hall, teleported next to me as Alduin's body burned to ask me if I wanted to go home. No no, I'll leave, don't want to overstay my welcome...

I once again set foot on mortal soil, again atop the Throat of the World. Oh sweet, I'm surrounded by dragons! This is what I'm talking about! Oh, Hi Paarthanax! Lookit what I did! Oh...you're not very happy with what I did? Ok...sorry? Hey Blades! Come see what I...whats that? You want me to kill Paarthanax? But I kinda like that guy...

Long story short, I finally beat Skyrim, but it was one of the more empty victories I've had in a video game (the last was the ending of the PS1's Legend of the Dragoon). The Blades now hate me (going to talk with them started the quest 'Paarthanax' where I am to kill the ancient beast) and dragons still ravage the land. I don't really feel as though I've accomplished anything.

That, unfortunately, is part of having a game that basically never ends. I could play for another 600 hours on my current character and feel as though there was more to do, which is a huge part of why I love the game as much as I do. While I will gladly exchange a satisfying ending for that amount of replay-ability, it still leaves me feeling...a bit empty.

This is Skyrim, though. The Dragonborn has no time to dwell on the past. I have Vampires to hunt, for tomorrow, Harkon of Volkihar will die!!!

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Ooo a vine...

I bow to your never ending wisdom, master Moogle. Never again shall I neglect your advice. I have seen the error of my ways, and I have learned. Oh have I learned........

Yet again I am playing FFIX (after yet again being shown my own internal organs in Dark Souls by the Taurus Demon. Yes, Mr. Demon. They are very pretty. No no, I most certainly do appreciate the way my blood sparkles in the light!). After finally meeting up with my favorite character of the game, Freya, and getting my monkey-tailed butt handed to me by her in the Festival of the Hunt, we are now off to her home nation of  Burmecia.

Oh but first we have to make a quick dash through Gizamaluke's Grotto, a place that even in adulthood I cannot pronounce (mostly because I don't care to try). It occurs to me that perhaps it would have been to my benefit to have done a bit of level grinding before heading straight here. At level 7 I certainly survive fights, but I feel as though I shouldn't be using a potion on everyone at the end of every battle.

Good old Moogles, always perfectly situated just where I need them. But whats this? A climbable vine in the Moogle room I had never noticed before? Why this seems the perfect opportunity for adventure! Whats that, Mr. Moogle? It's dangerous up here? Poppycock! I got this!

Atop the vine I found myself in a small grassy area with two large forest type things (PS1 graphics can be....abstract). Neat, I though, emerging from one of the forest...things. Lets see whats in the other forest...thing! Halfway to my destination the screen swirls and battle music booms triumphantly as I find myself face to face with...a dragon. Well crap.

Since silk shirts and leather hats don't protect particularly well against a Thundaga spell to the face, I reloaded my save from the game over screen and promptly ran in the opposite direction, toward the thing I was actually supposed (and capable, theoretically) to be killing: Gizamaluke. He too proceed to murder the three brave (and one annoying) warriors in my party.

Ok, I have him this time. Stupid fish can't fight me if he has A TENT IN HIS FACE! With above mentioned tent in his face Gizamaluke was pretty easy. I should probably level grind now.....

In a non-gaming note, Aaron and I earned our blue belt in karate today. YAY BLUE BELT!

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

RAAAAAAAAAAAAGE

Wow. That took a quick turn, even for me.

While I can proudly say I managed to NOT chuck my controller into my living room TV, I can't remember the last time I screamed that loudly or that many obscenities while playing anything, and that includes the last time I played Zombies. I don't mind dying, I DO mind nonsense teleporting behind me to spread my innards all over the nonsense in front of me. I can only handle so much (which really isn't all that much), so ON TO THE NEXT GAME!

I found myself quite surprised by the collection Aaron has accumulated on his PS3, and even more surprised by my complete lack of desire to play most of them. I loaded up Ratchet and Clank, but quit out at the loading screen. I then turned to the PS1 games he had on the system hoping for a twinge of nostalgia.

BAM, one of the first PS1 titles was Final Fantasy IX, my favorite of the Final Fantasy franchise and one of my favorite games of my childhood. I love that feeling, experiencing something for the second, third or fourth time years and years later, comfortably familiar yet just enough of it's details escape your memory that it feels somewhat new.

Just as before, I once again fell in love with the game. I love the style and the music, the story and its characters. All of its little quirks. Now that I am playing it as an adult it's a completely different experience. I'm now catching things I know I missed before, little nooks and crannies I never checked, abilities and strategies I never thought to maximize.

Then, in the middle of my happy trip to the past, I died in a fight. Zidane vs the first Black Waltz. I didn't account for turn speed and thus my life saving potion, set to be drunk upon my very next move, went unused as the Waltz's little pet Sealion decided my face was a perfect place to chuck a Blizzard spell. No big deal, I naively believed, I just didn't pay attention, I'll get him this time.

As I reloaded the game I came to the realization that, hey! Old games don't autosave!!! You know, autosave, that nifty little feature that most players, myself included, have come to take for granted. I loaded back in the middle of the Evil Forest, a clean 45 minutes from where I had been. Next game please!!!

Thus I spent the remained of Aaron's nap (he was asleep in the chair next to me, having passed out just after I started FFIX) playing Majong. So much for that. Tomorrow I think I'll throw Dark Souls back in, then more FFIX after I (inevitably) quit in a fiery explosion of anger and hate.


Well that was unexpected........

(I actually typed this post yesterday on my laptop, but couldn't log in here to post. whoops)

I figured I'd go easy on myself, so Shadow of the Colossus it was!
I'm pretty sure I spent more time watching cut scenes than actually playing the game. Beautiful cut scenes, but ultimately not why I was there. After finally gaining control of my character (or the Wanderer, as he prefers to call himself) I spent the next few minutes running in circles and fiddling with the camera until it was actually usable. After running across a large open field on a horse that didn't seem to like me (just go dude, I'm hitting X) and climbing a cliff face, I finally set eyes on the first colossus  and boy was he ugly (in a pretty kinda way). I got no farther than knee height to that big bull when my levels of self loathing reached Dark Souls levels.
So, with a lump in my throat and a stone in my stomach, I loaded up Dark Souls. The opening cinematic is gorgeous, and I'm always happy to hear a (rare) female voice over for narrations. Then comes character creation, and boy are these people ugly. It isn't very often that someone NOT blinking is the less creepy option. As with nearly every game I play, I named my creepy little hollow Yana, and made her a Knight (in fantasy games I HIT THINGS WITH MY STICK!!!!!!). 
Sitting in my cell at the game's opening I again spent a little time fiddling with the controls, accidentally using all three if my starting gifts (Goddess' Blessing) while trying to swing my sword hilt. Cursing my loss of early healing ability and in desperate need of an actual weapon, I left the comfort of my cell.
I do believe I died more to the first colossus than I did to the first big monster in Dark Souls, which blew my mind sideways eight directions. After watching Aaron play and die again and again and again in this game, I prepared myself for rage and anger and all that fun, awful stuff. And die I did, several times in the hour that I played (I was expecting my new landlord any time, and you can't pause Dark Souls. He never came by), but for some reason, completely against my gaming nature, not even a hint of rage entered my brain.
According to Aaron, my resident expert (giggle), Dark Souls avoids causing rage because players expect to die. It's almost a game mechanic. You play Dark Souls knowing full well that you are going to be seeing that bonfire (Dark Soul's version of a checkpoint) alot. He freely admits to having Dark Souls Stockholm Syndrome.
I think I'll continue playing, see how long my inner gamer rage can remain contained. 

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Whoops!

No post in two days? I'm off to an awesome start!

The last two days have been a bit hectic, getting ready for the LARP event yesterday. I seriously underestimated how long it would take to wash a van full of tabards and other costuming. I also massively underestimated how long it would take to paint a baby's room, a fact which hindered me from completing the tabards in time for the event yesterday *meh shrug*.

Tomorrow I am going to perform a rarity: play a game I have never played before. I generally stick to my usuals, games I have played over and over and over again. I have played to completion Legend of Zelda Majora's mask and Ocarina of Time more times than I can recall, but I have never even touched 90% of our game collection. Perhaps the worst (and most hilarious) example of this is my strange relationship with Skyrim.

I have over 600 hours between 3 characters, one of which takes up 400 of those hours. Yet as many days and weeks as I have spent in the Nord homeland, I have yet to actually beat the primary story line on ANY character. I have also avoided completing Dragonborn and Dawnguard, completing MAYBE 50% of any main story quest sequences.

So what could I possibly be doing during those 600 hours? Killing goats. Sure I kill other things, and I have finished a ton of side stories (thieves guild, Dark Brotherhood), but I spend an embarrassing amount of time killing small harmless animals and rearranging my houses.

So, tomorrow I will try something new. Depending on how I am feeling, I will either play Shadow of the Colossus (if I'm feeling good) or Dark Souls (if I decide that I hate myself). Either way I'm working outside of my nice comfortable box.

Yay.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

*cracks open the door of blogging and peeks inside*

Here I am. After months of hounding from my boyfriend to start a blog, here I am.

I have never been much of a writer. I generally leave that sort of thing to him. I am more of a talker. I love to talk. I don't shut up, is what I'm saying.

So I bid you, dear readers, welcome to this experiment into madness I am conducting. Prepare yourselves as I too join the ranks of the bloggers to splatter my own brand of nonsense into the interwebs.

So here we go!